Treat Me Right

Welcome back. It has been a tough journey, but here we are persevering the best way we can in 2021.

A few weeks ago, I watched Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom on Netflix, as millions of us have. It is an engaging and thought-provoking story that speaks on race, religion, the wealth gap, and the historic exploitation of black recording artists by white record executives. I’ve been a huge fan of August Wilson since reading his play, Fences at the age of nine- and re-reading it more than six times since then. If you haven’t read The Coldest Day of the Year or Two Trains Running, please stop reading this, type both titles (actually every piece of work he’s written) into Google, and pour over these amazing written works of art- then come back. There’s no question that August Wilson truly was the theater’s “poet of Black America,” but I digress.

There’s a dialogue in the second act/part of the movie from Ma Rainey, played by the marvelous, award-winning Viola Davis, to the leader of the band who is also the guitar and trombone player, Cutler, played by the award-winning actor Coleman Domingo (side note- he’s one of my favorite actors, have you caught up on the latest season of Euphoria?). You learn insight into how her record company views her and why she speaks to the executives any way she wants. “All they want is my voice. Well. I done learned that, and they gonna treat me like I want to be treated no matter how much it hurt them. They back there now calling me all kinds of names…calling me everything but a child of God. But they can’t do nothing else. They ain’t go what they wanted yet. As soon as they get my voice down on them recording machines, then it’s just like I’d be some whore, and they roll over and put their pants on. Ain’t got no use for me then.” The way Viola Davis delivers these lines hit me like a brick. So many individuals have had their talent and creativity drained from them by their jobs as if they are giving blood- myself included. Over the past couple of years, I took the time to learn that it has been my fault for not setting boundaries of what or how much a company or individuals can take from me- the word no is easier for some than others. So like Ma Rainey (minus a few explicative words), I too have clapped back to those who try to see how much they can stretch my capabilities. You’re smart, so I know you already know that whomever you work with/for, they need you just as much, if not more than you need them. If they didn’t need you, they wouldn’t have hired you for your skillset. Sure they can bring on someone else, but they want you, so teach them how you want to be treated. Of course, you want the agreed-upon work to be precise and complete on time, but don’t work to the point of exhaustion, don’t allow delayed payments of an invoice or paycheck, and don’t tolerate disrespect from anyone in any form.

I hope we all continue to build up our inner strength and loudly speak up for ourselves the way Ma Rainey did.

The original Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom Playbill from 1984.

Big Bus, Cab Service

Have you ever experienced one of those days where everything comes so easily that it seems you’re in a happy version of The Twilight Zone? It could be around anything such as you’re the first person in the laundromat, so you can sing and dance in there like no one is watching or you get the prime spot in yoga class and then walk outside and Pop Chips is giving away free chips on the corner- I can’t be the only one these situations have happened to. If you haven’t experienced a “cool-breeze” type of day then you need some energy work done, because something isn’t right.

Recently, I experienced this type of day. On a chilly NYC winter day, Orande and I decided to walk around and go to an early evening movie. So I started out my morning early with a great workout, afterwards I began what is usually an exhausting drawn out process of detangling, washing and deep conditioning my hair, but somehow on this particular day it went faster (I know my natural hair ladies get this on every level). My outfit decision was effortless and for once I was ready on time! We took the subway downtown, which came as soon as we arrived on the platform AND got my favorite seats- the corner pocket two-seater. At the movie theater, we secured prime recliner seats- can you feel magic? It gets better- after the movie we strolled around a bit and caught the “luxury” bus uptown, we say it’s luxury b/c it’s Coach-esque- think clean, plush, recliner seats versus the usual dirty MTA bus, and even though it usually takes about an hour to get home it took probably 35-40 minutes. We came to the conclusion that the since it was late at night, the driver must’ve been ending is his shift because he took short cuts and didn’t even stop at the mandatory stops to pick up other patrons. I guess that’s why he asked us as we got on what stop we were going to- we were close to the end of his route. When we got off Orande said “That was a fast ride bro”, the drivers response “Yea man- big bus, cab service.” Indeed it was cab service. To end this portion of the evening, we ordered pizza and it was delivered 10 min after we entered the house. Pretty prefect, am I right?

Like I said earlier, these days don’t have to be around anything specific and it doesn’t even have to be a full day of karmic happenings. Make it easy on yourself, like arriving to work on time- when you’re usually late or completing a task you thought would take you longer than expected. Sometimes you just have to have a different outlook on your day for it go flow a little easier for you. For me it’s all about my mindset. If I know I have something planned for the next day that I’m not fully into, I may already be frustrated going to sleep, which only plays into my mood when I wake up. Therefore, I’m expecting the day to be off-center because I’ve already put in my mind it’s going to be that way. I set myself up. Life and adulting are hard enough, so why put more angst on ourselves? Give yourself a break once and a while and let it the good times roll!

I present to you…the luxury bus.