strength

The Shiv

My close friend Shivaughn, is one of the most real, sarcastic, funny and insightful people I know.  She moved to LA and recently became a mother to a gorgeous baby girl with her fiancé. Even after motherhood, she’s still fiery and up for challenges, just more protective of her space. We’ve had some hilarious and also scary adventures together and for some reason, those scary adventures revolved around being in a car.

Years ago  Shivaughn, my other friend Weeza and I shared a cab ride home from a late night out. At the time we all lived in Brooklyn and luckily a cab picked us up in the rain. As we were driving over a bridge, we asked the driver to make 3 stops for each of us, since we all lived in close proximity. The driver said he would only make two stops, so we had to figure out the 2. I tried to reason with the driver and have him understand that it’s late and pouring rain, so we should each be dropped to our homes. Not caring he said no. That’s when Shivaughn jumped in and argued the driver down to the bone. She told him it was illegal to not drop us off since we were already in the car and I’m sure tons of explicit words were thrown around too. Once again the driver did not care and he argued back and forth with her and threatened to throw us out of the cab on the bridge. He even stopped the cab a couple times on the bridge and literally was going to kick us out.  Weeza, not knowing what to say, kept quiet. I spoke to the driver again and asked him to not kick us out, at this point he was putting us all in danger. Finally, we reached destination #1, which was my house. I think told Shivaughn to get out and she could stay with me or catch a cab from my house, we lived closest to each other. Of course, she refused and told the driver to take her home. Weeza, unfortunately, was the one who had to take another cab home from Shivaughn’s stop.  It felt like that was a nightmare, poor Weeza.

Although the cab driver was a bastard and that was a crazy night, Shivaughn stuck up for what she felt was wrong. Her method may have been extreme, but she has always remained unapologetically herself. Fast forward to current day and she is much calmer now that reflects her maturity and the different stage she is in her life, but at the core she is "The Shiv".  She’s always willing to put herself out there no matter the response, extremely encouraging and supportive, but will "Knuck if you Buck" ( early 2000's Crime Mob song reference) if she feels herself or those around her are being disrespected. I admire her for her strength and tenacity, I’m working on adhering those things within myself. So thank you Shiv, for giving me an example of courage,  of how to evolve from past situations and being the yang to my yin.

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A throwback photo of us.