parents

What's Feeding You?

It’s important that we watch and see things in life that will impact our spirit on an elevated level. It’s true that what you see and listen to impact our psyche. But we all have our guilty pleasures right? Don’t judge me, I watch a few of The Real Housewives branches and laugh at the buffoonery of these women and men doing obscene things and acting ridiculous. Yes, I can do better by not watching it and there’s no “ifs, ands, or buts” about it- no excuses, just facts. I also read a really good (to me) book every two weeks, watch documentaries, comedies, news, etc. (ya’ll don’t need to know my TV history list, but you get it). It’s a balance that I’m working on.

The reason I'm bringing up this topic of visual and audible stimulation is, the other day I was on the subway (in NYC) around 8:30 am. It was crowded as per usual at that time, but not overly so. Across from me sat a man with a large baby stroller- which held an infant girl inside, a woman (I’ll call her woman #1) and an appx. 7 year old boy were next to him. They seemed to be an average family going about their day. The subway decided to go “morning express”- meaning it skips 8 stops in between the next major one. I personally loved this and did a little shimmy in my seat, but the family across from me were unprepared for the switch up. They rushed off the train not looking or excusing themselves to any one in their path from the seat to the door. Another woman (I’ll call her woman # 2) who was standing by the door, was almost knocked to her feet- thankfully someone caught her before that happened. I found out later that she had the volume in her headphones turned up loud and didn’t hear anything. Unfortunately the train was being held at the station for a few moments, and the doors were still open. Woman #2 decided to scream and curse loudly at the couple, who were now on the platform getting themselves together. Woman #1 shouted back and they had a huge shouting match (basic angry playground language), until the man from the couple stepped in. He got in woman #2’s face and threatened to beat her down; drag her out of the subway and screamed racial slurs at her. Woman #2 screamed back to him that she would get her brothers to fight him; how dare he threaten her; he’s disgusting; etc., etc. By this time, an older gentleman stepped in front of woman #2 to protect her, because the other man was really close to her face. Mind you woman #1 wasn’t trying to calm the situation down. She was letting the cookies crumble where they may. And boy did those cookies crumble. Their shouting match further escalated to the point that when the older gentleman was trying to move woman #2 further into the train so that she would be safe, the man SPIT on woman #2…yes ladies and gents…SPIT. The older gentleman turns and tells the man about himself and how disrespectful the whole display between them was. He also let him know that he should be ashamed to even get so worked up that his ego had to show off in that way in front of his woman and his young children. The older gentleman turned to woman #2 and told her about her actions as well, and how horrible her words were to woman #1 and the man. Woman #1 finally stepped up and took the man’s arm and told him “let’s just go”, as if a lightbulb in her head went off that their conduct was disgusting. During this entire display of anger and misplaced energy, the infant girl was screaming her head off and the 7 year old boy was staring dumbfounded at his parents and woman #2. By God’s grace the subway doors closed moments after the older gentleman was speaking to woman #2. The ride then went on as if the past 8 minutes never happened, but what I saw stayed with me for most of that day. I couldn’t shake how something that could have been easily resolved by saying “excuse me, I’m sorry.” from woman #1 to woman #2, intensified into a screaming battle from all three people and a gross saliva throw onto woman #2. I tried to put myself in that little 7 year old boy’s place, seeing his parents act so audaciously and disgusting, hearing the words that were said from all parties. These are the things that are shaping his mind. They were showing him an example of how they feel is a proper reaction to this sort of situation. I then thought of what else this little boy has seen and heard from his parents and the adults they surround themselves with. He will forever be impacted by that moment and obviously I don’t know for sure, but I bet he did not bring it up and ask questions about it after.

I’m not here to pass judgment on any one, but I am here to urge us all to do and be better than we were yesterday. You are what you eat and you also are what you watch and listen to. With that said I’d like to ask what have you seen and heard that has impacted you both in either a good and bad way? Who are you surrounded by? What are you turning your screens on to? What’s in your coming up and recently played list on your streaming services (Netflix, YouTube, Spotify, Hulu, Apple TV, Amazon, etc.)? I’d love to know and if there’s anything that makes you uncomfortable to share, I’d be interested to know why.

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We’re surrounded by visual and audible stimuli, how is that feeding our minds?

Hamster

Can Hamsters be depressed? I need to do more research into certain animals. Not many people are googling symptoms of depression for hamsters, at least at the age of 10 I wasn't.

I love animals, except birds, I have a HUGE fear of birds. That's another story that we won't get into right now. When I was a child my parents gifted me a hamster, I named him Teddy, he was super cute with fur the color of caramel. He loved to play in the mazes I created and on the spinning wheel in his cage. So a few nights of him being a part of our family, I woke up to noises of banging in his cage. I didn't think anything of it, maybe he was going extra hard on his wheel to work off dinner. The following night I heard the same noise. I turned on the light to find Teddy hanging from the top of his cage by his paws. He saw me staring and then just dropped to the bottom. Freaked out, I ran into my parents room and told them what Teddy was doing...he was trying to hurt himself. Of course being 10, they thought my imagination was getting the best of me, so the next night I woke them up so they could see it for themselves. It was confirmed, Teddy was trying to hurt himself. Why else would a seemingly happy animal hang from the top of a cage and consistently drop over and over again? I was so upset.

As if Teddy knew the inevitable of his fate, aka me returning a suicidal hamster to the pet store, one night I hear my dad scream and then a bang. Immediately I ran into my parents room, wondering what happened. He responded with, "something was on my face,  I smacked it and it flew across the room and hit the wall." I knew then it wasn't just "something", it was Teddy. My dad and mom knew it too. My dad then apologized for flinging Teddy as he didn't know what it was crawling on him in the dark. It also goes to show how agile and determined Teddy was. He broke out of his cage, crawled across the hallway to my parents room got up to the bed somehow and was crossing over my dad. To do what? I don't know, but my guess is to jump out of the window next to my dad.  I'm not sure why he tried to kill himself by jumping from the top of the cage or trying to jump over my dad to go out the window. I loved Teddy, but apparently hamsters can get depressed too. Obviously the saying doesn't apply just to Annie and Jay Z, it was a hard knock life for Teddy as well.

PS- Teddy was fine, we took him back to the pet store in the following days. I also got another hamster and named him "Teddy II". Clearly my imagination only went so far in regards to pet names.

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His cage looked similar to this one. Maybe he was mad it was purple?