Do you believe you have all the tools needed within you to win at life? I do. I believe we all are born with everything we need, but we have to possess the thought process of knowing this. A dream deferred is just that, deferred. It’s not gone, you may just have to take a different route to get there. Or maybe your dream is not your purpose but the steps you take to reach that dream is the pathway to your purpose.
Depression, self-resentment, etc. have caused me to throw a pity party for a large portion of my life up until a few months ago. I literally woke up one day and said “enough, I’ve had enough”. I had prayed and asked for answers but never listening to the answers given. I was continuously blocking my blessings because I couldn’t get out of my own way, my own emotions of self doubt. That morning when I said enough, it was as if I was given a new outlook. Of course those self deprecating thoughts will try and sneak in, but I am able to mentally toss them aside and say those aren’t for me any longer. I’ve prayed differently since then, instead of selfish prayers (as I call them), I pray for insight and the ability to see and listen to what He is showing and telling me. I learned to set my attention on my intentions.
When I was a child I wanted to be a singer, I even went to college for a bit and majored in voice. That was not my path, but I had always wrote songs, poems and stories, not realizing the footprints I was creating for my life. I believe if I hadn't taken the long route and thought my childhood dream of being a singer was all I was meant to be, I wouldn’t have eventually discovered my purpose of writing.
I say this a lot but, no matter if no one else believes in you, you have to believe in yourself. Be the best version of yourself, where you become what you want to see in the world and live in a space of gratitude. By gratitude I don’t mean saying please and thank you all the time to people, although you should, but noticing things and saying it out loud. For example when you notice love by a mom holding their child’s hand crossing the street, speak it out loud or internally, “thank you for showing me love”. You’ll notice that your gratuitous attitude brings lots of positivity to you, at least that’s what I’m learning. Everyone’s experience will be different but, what’s the harm in trying it out.
I hope your holiday time with friends, family and yourself has been beautiful and that your 2018 is blessed with everything that you never expected but have manifested. Cheers to us all!
I'll end this post with the infamous poem by Langston Hughes.
Harlem
What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore—
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over—
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?