womanhood

Makeup Demon

Let me set the scene: it’s an early weekday afternoon at a Sephora on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. I’m dressed casually in a black leather hat, my glasses, a hoodie, some sneakers and only eyeliner. Of course I know the deal of going to Sephora with little to no makeup is a set up waiting to happen. Nevertheless, I just needed to replace my under eye concealer and that’s it.

Knowing the concealer I usually get, I wanted to ask an associate for another suggestion.  That associate or "cast member", as I believe they are called, lead me to an older African American woman co-worker we’ll call her Tess. Tess asked me about 6 times in disbelief about the concealer I was using and how many years I've been using it. She proceeds to show me two others, one that is literally the color of my palm and the other that was actually on tone. Opting for one that reflects my actual complexion, as if she was testing me, she nods in approval. You’d think it’d end there...of course not. Tess asks in probably her shadiest tone when will I graduate to foundation and eyebrows, etc? I give her a snarky smirk and say “maybe when I’m your age I'll need it”. I honestly believe she liked our shady banter. Again, you’d think it’d end there...it doesn’t. Tess goes on to ask what kind of eyeliner do I use, stating that she can do my lines better? I respond with, "Nah, I'm good. I came for the concealer and I threw on this eyeliner so I wouldn’t look like I just came from the gym" aka your getting your commission, now leave me alone.  During checkout, the cashier asks if anyone helped me and Tess happens to be behind her so I let her know. The cashier gives a snort and responds with, “oh Tess helped you? Ha! I’m sure that was an experience”. I laugh and tell her she definitely can use a customer service workshop. 

As I left with my purchase I scrambled for my phone and immediately called one my best friends, Aqila aka Qilah. I tell her the whole story in full detail. We both laugh and Qilah responds with “who the hell does that?! She gets commission, so the unsolicited questions and info she decided to share weren’t necessary. Lucky it wasn’t me, I wouldn’t have been as nice, no one should do that.” Laughing and hearing her say that made me miss my friend even more. She lives in ATL now, so I don’t get to see her as often as I would like. Qilah has always been my sister since I’ve known her, she's my family through and through. We don’t have to be on the phone for hours or see each other often, but knowing you have a friend you can call for stupid rants or in depth life conversations are the ones you want to hold on to.

Don't ever feel like you have to wear make up or let any one ever tell you what you need to make yourself look "more beautiful" or "trend acceptable". Makeup is an enhancement of your natural state. You shouldn't be wiping off your entire face at night and becoming a different person. Also, get yourself a friend like Qilah and stay away from makeup demons like Tess.

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Not the store I went into, but you get it.

The Esthetician

A friend of mine, Gina, started getting waxed by this young esthetician a couple months ago, we'll call her Nari. She describes Nari as a " super nice late 20 something girl who does her job b/c it's familiar to her and she's good at it". Apparently she's the best at body waxing, threading eyebrows, etc. Gina genuinely liked her enough to want to be friends with her outside of Nari's work. I told her that's great, but would it be weird? If people asked where did you guys meet, what would be the response? Would you say, " Nari knows me in the same regards as my gyno"? I mean at least it would be a good conversation ice breaker.

The other day Gina went to her appt. w/Nari. Afterwards she called me and asked, "How do I tell Nari she didn't do a good job"? My response was to tell her she didn't do a good job and see if she can do it over. This was not what Gina wanted to hear (Kanye shrug). She was worried that if she told Nari this it would sound mean.  Nari had confided in her that she was going through some family stuff, which is why she didn't feel like herself. So this situation is EXACTLY why they can't be friends at both her job and outside, she has to pick one.  Either keep it casual at her job while she's performing her services or don't go to her professionally and just hang out. Customer service whether a friend or not is the most important. I mean it's a paid service, Nari isn't doing this for free and even if she was she still needs to do it right. The conclusion of this Gina and Nari episode is that Gina did not tell Nari she didn't do a good job but promised next time she would.  Nari sounds nice and all, but get a grip girl and by grip I mean around that waxing stick and do it right.

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Took this on my iPhone. Since we're talking about waxing, a bird and a flower have perfect alignment.