Adulthood

Friendsgiving

This past Saturday, one of my best friends, Rashawn and I held our 5th Annual Friendsgiving in her home. We initially started to throw Friendsgiving dinners because we would be home during Thanksgiving time, either due to tickets being too expensive to visit family out of state or just our daily life schedules. Friendsgiving to us represents a community of close friends all celebrating each other, being thankful we all have one another and focusing on the joy that life is no matter your situation. Our first one, was smaller in numbers because people were going away that year, but what it lacked in numbers it made up for in the great time that was had. When we look back it was the perfect size. The following year it got insane. friends that didn't make it the previous year, ALL made a point to come that year and they invited people. Rashawn has a big apartment but the overflow was leaking into all the bedrooms, hallways, even out the door. It was definitely a turn up, but it needed to be turned down. It got to a point that there were people no one knew coming in and thus getting away from what Friendsgiving was about.  From then on we learned to say "invite only" on the evites aka don't bring other people unless you ask first.

Oftentimes Friendsgiving acts as the one time of year most of us will have the opportunity to see each other, so everyone makes that time count. The abundance of food and drinks can make you gluttonous. Everyone brings something whether it be a dish, liquor or something to serve the food on. No one goes hungry and in some cases people don't leave without taking leftovers home.

The past few years, Rashawn set up a photo booth area in one of her rooms. I call that room, the locker room, since she has a full set of red lockers in that room she uses for storage, it's pretty dope. Anyway, no matter the gathering people will flock to the locker room which also has couches and chairs. This year she created an Instagram page for the occasion and everyone that took pics in the photo booth, which she made using her iPad and a downloadable app, were able to upload the pics directly to the page. Therefore cancelling out everyone asking for the pics and video taken post Friendsgiving. Who doesn't love a group photo and taking fun videos with friends? Imagine doing this mixed with full stomachs and drinks in hand? What do you end up with? Hilarious buffoonery that's what! We all know the size of a regular iPad screen, so 8-10 people running in the room and trying to fit was not happening. It was tried nonetheless, even if someone only got their forehead in. My friend Sansarae was basically Beyonce in one of the videos and everyone else were the back up. Orande, Rashawn and Greg have a video where they are all doing the Milly Wop, that video left me laughing to tears and there's also a video of me thinking we're all taking a photo, until Rashawn tells me it's a video. I'm posing for a good 8 seconds until it's realized, it 's ridiculous and funny at the same time. There's way too many to recap, but you get it, it was fun.

Throughout the times at Friendsgiving  I always realize how beautiful it is that we can all gather to just have a good time, great vibes with delicious food (Orande makes mac and cheese that people go savage for and same goes for Denise's banana pudding. If your not quick then you'll miss out). It's so easy to get flustered through life, but if you can have only one moment in a year with close friends, let it be a gathering such as this, it helps in saying hakuna matata much easier as you go throughout your days.

If you don't know this scene then do yourself a favor and watch the Lion King. Hakuna Matata! P.S. I also saw The Lion King on Broadway last week and it was incredible!

If you don't know this scene then do yourself a favor and watch the Lion King. Hakuna Matata! P.S. I also saw The Lion King on Broadway last week and it was incredible!

Work

If you moderate your diet, but never exercise will that bring you the best physical version of yourself? I'm not an expert, but I highly doubt it. If you don't water your in-home plants will they grow? The answer is no. Marriage in my personal opinion requires work on self from the mental, spiritual, physical, emotional and intellectual parts of you as well as from your spouse. You have to water your relationship to nourish it.

Orande and I just came back from a beautiful week in Cozumel celebrating our 2nd wedding anniversary. On vacations we like to unplug from the world, which means no contacting people outside of a quick check in with family to let them know we are safe and no social media. By doing this it allows us to focus only on us, it is not something we do only on vacations, but we incorporate this within our marriage often. Love and marriage is hard work, it requires more energy than your 9 to 5, but it's the most rewarding. There is no marriage we model ours off of, as there is no perfect example and no perfect people. We learn to make our own rules and find out what works best for us. Marriage is not made for the faint of heart. There will be ups and downs, smiles and frowns, tears and happiness and heartache and hard love. But if you can't imagine going through any of those things without your significant other then it is all worth it. Your love for each other will persevere and flourish with your continuous effort.

I was told by someone I trust that him and I together are more powerful than either of us can imagine and I truly believe that. I'm thankful and blessed that we are in this thing called life together. 

Should I have warned you that this post would be sentimental?  If I did where would the suspense have been?! Share what works for you in your relationship in the comments, would love to hear!

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This is us on our wedding day walking into our lives.